What am I to do with myself? I have horrible manners. I'm vicious and repulsive.
When I was young I had this not-too-wonderful experience of handling a bank employee. She just got mad at me for being ignorant. Besides that I also cannot deal with promoters, they tend to release their frustration on their customers. It is like we have to buy the product.
Anyway, today it happened again. I made the bank promoter angry. I don't know, was I right to listen to her promote her product or was I wrong to lead her on? Ugh...and while I was listening to her I admit I was not real nice and attentive. All my answers were bland and dull. The usual 'Yup', 'Uh-huh' and 'I don't know'. I'm feeling guilty and a bit disappointed, cause she did not take my rejection well and just quickly hang up. Maybe its policy so as to not waste anymore time and money. Oh! I was also thinking darkly that I should make her talk long so that she uses more money for the call.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY HEAD?!!!! how could I purposely thought that. I suppose from the start of the call I should have said "No, sorry I'm not interested in anything you have to offer." The situation would have been way more simple. Have I not learn anything from past experience?? Apparently, not.
Furthermore, today I got an impromptu lecture from an uncle I usually see and sometimes greet in the campus. It was in Bahasa Malaysia so honestly half the time I had no idea what he was talking about. He spoke real fast so all I could do was look and reply like I understood. The gist of it is that even if I have a weapon I should use my brain and protect my country and family. I suppose I agree with that but even with smarts nothing is certain. I try put the issue of war and chaos at the back of my brain because I'm a coward and I'm selfish, but maybe someday that too will have to go.
note: Final is in 6 days. I'm nervous and yet relaxed. I think I'm in for a ride. Blargh.
